From vulnerability

A New Year’s Dream

Hello beautiful ones and a very lovely and sacred New Year to all. Many of us are giddily happy that 2020 is leaving; what a hard, sad, and often scary year it’s been. Many of us are experiencing it in our bones, muscles, and organs. I’m looking in the mirror and, with some shock, see a lot more lines and wrinkles.

Covid has certainly ushered us into a new reality, but if one is ready for it, this ongoing experience may be bringing us an incomparable gift. The pandemic has proven that we are not really in as much control of things as we may have thought. We are still deeply subject to the vast powers of nature, illness, and death. And the gift of this great, collective humbling? I believe we’re being offered (should we be up to receiving it) the gift of authenticity. Like the Velveteen Rabbit in the classic children’s book, we are becoming more real.

A gift like this, however, comes with a high price; Some major illusions were ripped away in 2020, and disillusionment can be quite painful. Death became much more of a companion, and dissent, anger, anxiety, and the questioning of truth has became the norm. This has been the year of transparency. For many, the concept of “safety” has been altered dramatically.

Many feel restless, stressed, and perhaps more strongly than ever, hearing a call to action clanging in our hearts. We may not know with any clarity what we are being called to do or be – but we are on high alert that change is happening now and full of potential opportunity. As the mystical poet Rumi wrote: “You must ask for what you really want. Don’t go back to sleep!” With the course of the pandemic taking its time, we’re not easily going to be going back to sleep.

Speaking of sleep, last night, I had a really vivid dream that I want to share with you. I hadn’t made any new year’s resolutions yet, but the dream showed me that my soul has most definitely set a new resolution. I crave dreams like this, for they seem to be one of the soul’s favorite ways to communicate with the conscious mind. An other way of communicating, by the way, is to hit us over the head with the proverbial two-by-four. I’ve had my share of those experiences, (and Covid is one of them!) and I much prefer paying close attention to my dreams!

In this dream, I was opening up some kind of new business. I don’t remember what kind of business, but in the dream, I was making a business plan. I was absolutely driven to include one very important aspect of the business, and I remember discussing it with some kind of advisor or business partner. What I dreamt, and felt adamant about was this: That each customer should feel very much loved.

I don’t remember much else about the dream but I woke up so happy and peaceful. It felt so right….that each customer should feel loved. Wow, I thought, I certainly do want that for my clients! People really need to feel loved, accepted, appreciated, and seen….and if only all businesses adopted this mission.

So there you have it. Know that when you call on me for help, I want to be a channel for love. I want you to feel it. I want love to flow through me and mirror back to you that you are truly loved. You’re deeply loved by the Universe. Yes, you are lovable, and lovable just as you are!

So many of us feel broken or damaged by our history. So many of us feel guilt, shame, anger, frustration, and sadness from this challenging endeavor of being human. But what I’ve come to learn in the nearly 30 years of working intimately with so many people, is that inside, we are all the same. Inside, we all want and need love. Inside, along with our many personality quirks, we actually are love itself.

All the rest–what we see on the outside of each other— is clothing stitched from various aspects of the struggle to survive. We see scars, we see unconscious habits, and we bump up against each other’s invisible armor. What we see on the outside of each other, though may seldom know what we’re seeing, is really conditioned patterns, programmed perceptions, and, so often, learned strategies to hide our feelings of vulnerability, unworthiness and fear.

I know that you are worthy of every single thing your heart desires, including to be loved unconditionally for who you are – warts and all. But do you know that? Are you judging your insides by other people’s outsides? Have you learned to hide your authentic self in order to survive or because you think others will reject you? What do you want for your life now? Who do you want to be in this life?

If you aren’t asleep, you may be truly understanding how poignantly fleeting this particular physical lifetime is. But where to go and how to go, day-by-day, with this understanding? Here are some suggestions/reminders of what to bring into this brand new year:

  1. Bring your intention to keep going within! Find the inner freedom of peace within every day. You need to make the Center Within your home base. All good flows from there!  Establishing a daily meditation or self-reflection time is important. Take your relationships there for inner council. Take your work in the world there for advice and blessings. Take your health problems there for healing. Listen within, then act externally as directed.
  2. Ask your Higher Self (or whatever you consider a higher Source) to show you both your shortcomings and your talents. Ask for the humility to see yourself with clarity. Edge up close to the darker places where you could have done better or given more. Just see this stuff. See it with non-judgement and open curiosity, as if you were looking at a painting; for you are a work of art, and a work of art in progress.
  3. Accept these dis-owned parts of yourself with compassion; for compassion is the gift of acceptance. Open your heart to these misguided, fearful, imperfectly perfect parts of yourself. See if you can muster some radical self-acceptance. As you open your heart to yourself, grace comes in the form of forgiveness. With self-forgiveness comes the ability to start anew, each and every day – to let go of the past and release your inner burdens of guilt, shame, and self-rejection! With forgiveness comes new energy, new choices, and the lightness of inner peace.
  4. Appreciate this beautiful and horrifying world that’s evolved from the collective unconsciousness. Accept all the people in your life who, if they could have done better, would have done better…for given the unconsciousness and programing that we’ve all inherited, we do go through life in various stages of being asleep. Accepting people’s limitations does not mean approval of them. It just means that you aren’t resisting the idea or the fact of them. They exist. What you do with your acceptance is your choice. Acceptance is freedom!
  5. Know that you aren’t alone. There is a Higher Power for good working within each of us and in the world. There are invisible forces of Light urging us all to grow and evolve. The Light shines through other people, in the natural world, in literature, art, music, all forms of creativity and science … Seek the Light to renew your spirit.
  6. Be the consciousness you want to see in the world. Baby step by baby step, make daily decisions to push beyond your fear, self-sabotage, and the inability to give yourself over to love and growth and peace. Be a warrior for living life fully and courageously in the face of heartbreak, violence, and death.
  7. Be grateful. Fill your consciousness with gratitude rather than negativity. Seek the higher perspective always. Keep your eye on the good and let that steer your flight. Affirm the good daily. Let the vibration of goodness lift your spirits, for the energy of gratitude does that. Sometimes we need some help feeling gratitude – reach out for help when you need it. Others can help lift your energy and spirit. We need each other for that!

So fly high, little earth-bound angel. As you are making plans or resolutions for the new year, please know that I am here to help in whatever way I can.

Wishing you a peaceful, joyful 2021, centered in who you are at heart – love.

Many Blessings!

Paula

My virtual office is open

Naked Faces, Illegal Hugs & last call for 20% off sale

I took this selfie last summer, when I was experimenting with wearing a face mask due to a troublesome allergy reaction. How eerily prophetic that less than a year later, we are all wearing face masks.

I have come to take a lot for granted. I believe we’re all waking up to that fact. I’ve taken safety for granted. I’ve taken healthy air for granted. And I’m realizing that I’ve taken faces for granted. Beautiful, bare faces — but no longer! Faces reveal so much about us. We are actually quite vulnerable when people see our faces, and I don’t mean just vulnerable to the virus. And how about eyes?  How fascinating and expressive eyes are when they are peeking over masks! Have you noticed?

There’s another thing that many folks take for granted; Some of us single-living folks are not being touched much these days. Typically, we get hugs, handshakes, and so many other pats or platonic touches in our daily life. But now those precious connections are paused. We don’t even accidentally bump into anyone. We’re not being massaged, or routinely getting chiropractic treatments either, unless it’s really essential.  We’re not getting our hair washed, cut and fluffed. Touch-hunger is a real thing, and the body registers lack of touch on physical, spiritual, and psychological levels.

My sister, who lives abroad, told me last week that her young grand-kids finally came over to visit their beloved granny. In their country, there have been very strict rules about traveling outside the immediate home area. But they’d all been missing each other something awful.  So they donned their masks, and as the country’s rules relaxed a bit, they decided to try to safely visit outside. However, in the end, neither my sister nor the kids could resist hugging each other. At least they kept their masks on. “Illegal” it may have been, and hopefully not too risky since they’d all been practicing sheltering-at-home, but the joy felt from it was immeasurable. 

Being touched is a crucial need for humans. It soothes anxiety and helps our nervous, digestive, and immune systems. Going without being touched has some big drawbacks. I had to ask myself, as I contemplated my own situation of living alone, what can help mitigate this really fundamental need of humans to feel connection through touch?

I did a little internet searching and found an interesting article in Time Magazine on ways to try to compensate for the lack of skin contact now, in light of Covid-19: 

https://time.com/5817453/coronavirus-human-touch/

The article describes how online video chatting, virtual dance parties and online group yoga or exercise classes can aid connection and stimulate hormones being released that are similar to the hormonal stimulation of touch. It’s so valuable to connect with others at this unprecedented time, and thank goodness for online access to other humans.

This is also an incredibly great time to connect deeply, not only with others, but also with your own soul. It’s important to feel compassion for ourselves and for what we’re going through. Don’t isolate from others, and also don’t turn away from the life of your soul. The soul hungers too. The soul cultivates courage. The nourishment we’re seeking now for courage can’t come from cookies, chocolate, alcohol or drugs that might be tempting as we try to escape the current reality. That escapism is human, and let’s be realistic, probably necessary at times, but ultimately, it’s only a temporary band-aid. It can’t be a steady, pandemic diet because it won’t nourish the courage we all need.

It’s such a blessing to connect spiritually with whatever is sacred to you – whether you call it Spirit, the Universe, God, Higher Power, Higher Self…whatever that is to you. So meditate, chant, pray…do whatever you’re called to do spiritually. Especially sweet is to connect with others who are on a spiritual path, which truly feeds that connection and courage hunger in a deeply nourishing way.

Shamanic soul retrieval and extraction, and Akashic Record readings are deeply personal journeys into your soul and what is sacred to you. These sessions bring you back to joy and wholeness, and connect you to your inner guidance, faith – and courage. Only your inner guidance can really inform you of what is healthy for you….and what isn’t. Only your personal guidance can give you the “a-ha’s” that open up perspectives, purpose, and broaden your world. My work is to be a channel of the sacred energies that have all our backs, twenty-four hours a day. I know that as rough as these times are, there is good that is already coming from it, and more on the way if we continue to grow as spiritual beings.

One last reminder: I am offering 20% off my shamanic soul retrieval and extraction sessions and 20% off Akashic Record readings in this month of April.  One week left to schedule an appointment, so don’t delay if you’re looking for more connection, courage, fulfillment and joy! Please contact me for a free consultation to discuss if my services might be helpful for you now. If you book an appointment in the coming week, we can set it up for May.

Be safe, be healthy,

Paula

The ruby slippers and 20% off

The famous poet T.S. Eliot wrote in his poem, The Waste Land, that “April is the cruelest month,” but this year, I’d have to say in the United States, it was March. Even though Covid-19 was raging in China in January, it seems we didn’t grasp the enormity of the pandemic until March, when we were forcefully shoved through an unknown portal which massively changed life — probably forever.  A curtain was pulled back, and we’ve been given an experience similar, perhaps, to what Dorothy encountered in the Wizard of Oz when she got a look at the real wizard, and realized he wasn’t the one who could get her back to Kansas.

Maybe we thought there were adults in charge who might actually keep things running more or less as they always ran. We thought if we played the game of life right, we might somehow predictably ride the train into a ripe old age.  But instead, we’re uncomfortably awakening to the fact that the power to feel safe and happy is not “out there”; it’s actually something we’ve had all along. We’re needing to learn this the hard way, by necessity. We’re being invited to find happiness within ourselves while the virus and chaos rage on.

Please don’t get me wrong, a paycheck and toilet paper are very, very fine things to have now. Scoring some t.p. now, or having a job, is a bit like winning the lottery. But, in fact, we might just have the power within to survive the loss of either.  I will call that power “Grace”.  It’s a spiritual thing, a gift of our Higher Self, and I think many of us now are seeing and feeling immense gratitude for the good we do have in our lives now.  Seeing our good, naming it, and being thankful for it, despite what’s happening externally, is the most important thing we can do now.  It calls in the Grace! Gratitude brings us more to be grateful for; this is spiritual law.

Just as Dorothy discovered that the Wizard wasn’t great at all, we see that the “adults in charge” are seemingly floundering and as vulnerable as we apparently seem to be. But when it comes to staying sane, grounded, safe and hopeful during these difficult times, the truth is that we must, AND WE CAN, find the power to go back home – to a sense of safety and joy.  We have to click our ruby slippers, like Dorothy did, and return to our inner sanctuary, where we find peace, guidance, creativity, joy and safety in the present moment.

The truth is that life has always been unpredictable.  We just were pretty much asleep to the full extent of that unpredictability. But on this almost incomprehensible scale, we’ve been awakened. I feel called to point you back to your spiritual empowerment. There are so many tools and so much Grace available to us, especially in this time of anxiety, fear and loss.  There is wisdom, connection, joy, humor and lots of love. There are people around to catch you – to virtually hug you when no touch is available. Don’t isolate, don’t despair. Instead, contemplate on the gifts of this time and please commit to keeping your spirits high. 

It’s crucial to do everything possible to keep your vibration high. Meditating daily, thinking positively, moving your body, and opening your heart are all very good practices to focus on now. Maintaining a high vibration is so important to your health.

Do stay safe and don’t entertain fearful thoughts. It’s such a powerful time to work on your inner world, and the fruits of that inner work will manifest externally in the days to come. We will emerge stronger and better from this time. Be the peace now that we want to collectively create — that we have long been hoping to manifest.  

My shamanic sessions and Akashic Record readings are powerful tools to use to heal trauma and deeply guide you into inner wholeness and rebirth. I am offering 20% off these sessions in the month of April. Please contact me if you’d like a complimentary consultation to discuss how these modalities could help you at this time.

For emotional and spiritual support, and consciousness expansion, I also recommend the following:   

1.  MONTHLY LIVE YOUTUBE FULL MOON MEDITATIONS

Every month, please join Indian teacher and enlightened being, Tejasaji, for a powerful live Full Moon Meditation during the Full Moon in India.

All are welcome. Subscribe to the link:

http://bit.ly/GoldenAgeMovement   (Same link to use monthly.)

This month, we will be meditating on Wednesday, April 8. Select a session below which is best for your time zone and just go to the link above. Feel free to meditate both times:  

Wed., April 8th –

1.) 5:30 am PT

6:30 am MT

7:30 am CT

8:30 am ET

Wed. April 8 –

2.) 8:30am PT 

9:30am MT

10:30am CT

11:30 am ET

2.  Also, for your daily meditations to calm anxiety, learn to meditate, lift your vibration and much more, I’m recommending two really wonderful apps: 

* Insight Timer.  It has 40,000 free meditations!

* Breathing Room.  This app includes a number of powerful, free meditations as well as a fee for other meditations, and there is a 7-day free trial. 

3. Lastly, there is another virtual, one-day, intensive, JOURNEY INTO HAPPINESS, that’s being live-streamed from India on Sunday, April 26, from 9:30am to 7pm.  You can find info and  registration for it by Kristin Panek of Flowering Heart Center.  Sit in your home and be transformed! Please check out the details and register here:  https://www.eventbrite.com/e/a-journey-into-happiness-tickets-101236557268?aff=efbneb

Please note there is a discount for those who are repeating the course. I can’t stress enough how much this course has helped so many people, myself included, to clear old hurts, to love, and to feel joy and peace –no matter what is going on in the world.

Wishing you all the very, very best.  Stay healthy and stay home if your work allows it.  Praying for the health and well-being for you, your family, and our planetary community. Don’t hesitate to reach out if I can be of help!

Love,

Paula

Intimacy Starts Within

 

“He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened.”
― Lao Tzu

Texting, tweeting, emails, sound bites; we now live in a world in which communication has been reduced to short, quasi-efficient snippets.  Perhaps the use of these things began as a way to stay better connected, but as we all know, that type of connection is very shallow.  It’s good for the basics of getting a communication task done, like announcing that you’re running late.  It’s not good for communicating anything that approaches intimacy.  Our ability to truly connect with each other is slipping away…

Deep Interpersonal communication is becoming a lost art, and, in my opinion, we need to urgently look at the source of that situation –for it is having dire effects on our culture; Our culture does not value or teach authenticity and, thus, people are losing their humanity. It seems to be getting harder and harder to see empathy and compassion in politics and government policies.  We see rampant, senseless crime instead.  We see inhumane treatment of animals, people, and the earth. In fact, we are being systematically programmed to be inauthentic and in denial of our deep disconnection.  We worry about our appearance, our money, our acquisitions, but not our hearts.

My fear is that the daily practice of communing within — with yourself and with whatever is sacred to you (like God, Spirit, the Higher Self) — will disappear like the dinosaurs. Meditation is a beautiful practice of self-intimacy, as is shamanic journeying (a form of meditation).  But one complaint I hear over and over is, “I don’t have time to meditate.”  This indicates that meditation is not valued or prioritized.  I honestly don’t know why it is so hard for us to value sitting still with ourselves.

In addition to entering into a really miraculous flow of one’s life, there are magical, mystical, subtle, and majestic terrains within, waiting to be explored and revealed when we practice daily meditation.  The nuance of subtle feeling states, the whisper of that famous “quiet voice within”, the thrill of synchronicities, ease of connections, unexpected opportunities, radical insights, extraordinary states of bliss…all this inner life is ours by birthright.  But if we don’t claim that territory, it will languish like fertile lands that go unfarmed, leaving us hungry for that which feeds the soul.  In short, we will become an automated, soul-less species.

What delivers us to soulful living, is simply to turn our gaze inward.  That requires pausing from the frenzy of life today.  It requires intention, breathing, and the spirit of an explorer – brave, open, curious, persevering in our quest to know ourselves and to be surprised in fact, by the rich abundance of the present moment.

Without connecting within, we can’t truly connect with others; we can’t share our tender vulnerability, our hungry hearts, or our loving compassion.  We can’t enjoy the comfort, adventure, and thrill of deepening relationships without intimacy.

Start a meditation practice, please, and stick with it!  Even five minutes a day, first thing in the morning, makes a difference.  Seek out what is personally sacred to you – it is a living presence within.  Connect with that – what a profound way to anchor your day and, in fact,  help humanity to step into its greatest potential!

If you need coaching or instruction in establishing a meditation or shamanic journeying practice, I can help you with that.  And if you are in the Chicago area, I’ll be leading a shamanic journey circle on Sunday, May 6, 1:30-4:30pm, in which you can connect intimately with your own spirit, in a loving ceremony of like-minded community.  For more information on that event, check it out here.

 

 

FROM THE INSIDE OUT

I just saw the Oscar-nominated film “Ladybird” and it brought me right back to my own teen years, and the teen years of my daughter.  What I loved about the film was that it held the frequently awkward space of intimacy, both within the self and with others, in a beautifully sacred way.  For the buried teen within us, it resurrects and celebrates that uniquely joyous, sometimes painful, hormonally chaotic and precious time of emerging individuality and loss of innocence.  It reminds us of what it feels like to play without knowing the rules; to feel your way through this huge thing that is life.

That teen in me seems to be saying hello lately, even as older age, on paper or by wrinkles, might project an image of wisdom.  I moved two weeks ago, and that particular event turned my life rather upside down. It was a happy, positive move, but it still created an upheaval and thrust me into unknown territory. I’ve felt kind of like an awkward teenager again, just like the heroine of Ladybird. Considering the past year’s political climate, the chaotic weather patterns, and the rollercoaster stock market this month, you might also find yourself feeling, as I do, just a little out of control.

When I was unpacking, I unearthed an old bumper sticker I had stashed away a while ago.  The bumper sticker says, “Let Go, Let Goddess.”  That’s been my mantra since I gratefully (and with perfect synchronicity) found it again!  Letting go and allowing a higher power (whatever that is for you) to carry you through difficult, unknown times is a lifesaver; it can return you to the thrill of living fully. It can make you feel like a teen again – alive – and experiencing your life unfolding with all the tumble of emotions that humans get to have.  As challenging as having emotions can be, I still wouldn’t trade them for numbness.

We all have within us a brilliant force of life and creativity that can’t be squashed.  Like the teen in Ladybird, it can take us into some very uncomfortable emotional places and also to the heights of bliss.  Learning to trust it and let it take the reins, in order to recreate your life, is the essence of walking a spiritual path.  As a teen, that authentic force can move mightily; but as adults, we might need to unlearn a lot of conditioning and release the resistance to change that we acquire as we age — in order to unleash that force’s life-imbuing power.

All the healing work I offer is given with the spirit of supporting you in peeling back the suffocating layers, in order to reclaim your authentic self. Over and over, the repressed divine self will call to you – in your dreams or fantasies, and in real-life opportunities. In order to return to feeling fully alive, we need to listen to that inner voice. We need to let go of the past and risk being present to the whirlwind of the here and now. We need to release the old patterns that prohibit us from taking on life as an unknown adventure, as it was in our earlier years. Finding that sacred, risk-taking hero or heroine within can be downright thrilling.

I love shamanic journeying and guided meditations because they are often a grand adventure.  Just like life, you’ll never know what you’ll find if you just let go and be present within the shamanic journey or meditation. Shamanic journeying and meditation can reveal guidance you’d never dreamed of, and insights that have been beyond your reach.

For the single women reading this, I want to draw your attention to a new virtual course (via conference call) that I’m offering called “Relationship Readiness.  As you may know, I just collaborated with Sue De Santo, Clinical Social Worker and Relationship Coach, to offer an in-person workshop in Chicago.  Now we are continuing our collaboration with this virtual, 4-part class series, so those outside of Chicago can experience it – or those in my area can take it from the comfort of their homes.  I’ll be leading two sessions that are completely shamanic journeying and guided meditation.  It has the potential to change your relationship history from the inside out – to free up that teen in you to attract the kind of relationship you’ve always wanted.  If you are interested, please read more details about it here.  And if you have to miss any of the classes, a recording will be available. Contact me for questions and registration.  Early-bird price of $219 ends on Feb. 14.

 

 

Burn Off Your Karma: Barriers to Love Class & Oneness Circle

 

journeycircleandmeditation2018 has swooped in like the splendid eagle. Many folks are talking about how different the energy feels this new year. It’s as if Spirit is loudly whispering in our collective ears, “grow, grow!” Can you feel the spiritual support of these challenging times building?  Yes, the external world is as troubled as last year….maybe more so…but internally, the fires of spiritual evolution are raging.  I say, stoke the fire! Let it burn off your karma, your stuckness, your confusion, and your fear!

How’s your love life doing in this first month of the new year?  How are those resolutions going? Perhaps you’re losing steam or even hitting the proverbial brick wall, despite your best intentions.  Well, here’s some “wind under your wings” that you can use to create lofty momentum for your heart-felt intentions to manifest in 2018…

For women who are single or in dating relationships, please join us for a workshop that helps break through the depressing loop of repetitious patterns and blockages in creating the love you want and need in your life. Check out “Overcoming Internal Barriers to Love” workshop on Sunday, Feb. 4, from 2pm-4:30pm in Chicago. Be prepared to ignite your innate capacity for romantic manifestation!

For men and women who want to clear out a bunch of inner conflict, raise their bliss capacity, and feel the peace and joy of Oneness, our monthly Oneness Deeksha Circle is meeting again this Tuesday night from 7:30pm -9pm in Chicago.

And for those who want to get serious about creating lasting lifestyle and spiritual changes in order to get healthier, more energetically balanced, more abundant, vibrant, and focused, please consider exploring private holistic health coaching and shamanic sessions.

I have 24 years of experience being a channel for my client’s spiritual wholeness and healing using the phenomenal, ancient methods of soul retrieval and extraction to address trauma and feeling stuck. Pair that with my other various tools for increasing relational happiness, and how to do your work in the world with passion and purpose.  Just contact me for a free consultation about how my soul retrieval work, readings, and/or holistic health coaching could assist you in igniting a phenomenal year of transformation.

The time is here and the stars are aligned.  Tuesday is a new moon….why wait? Take action now!  You won’t regret it, for there’s a ton of spiritual power now, supporting you to take the right kind of action that brings you closer to manifesting your heart’s desires.

 

 

 

Why the Goofy Hearts?

Valentine's DayDid you ever put your heart “out there” and get what feels like a big, empty, no-response from the universe?  I mean, a big, invalidating, nothing.  That’s happened to me in my dating life, in my creative efforts, in friendships at times, and in my career.  When we take the risk of opening ourselves, to be seen, and to be vulnerable, we risk feeling hurt when the offerings of our open heart are not appreciated or returned.  When this happens, our inner defense patterns and heart walls can get thicker. This process can start in childhood, when our inner-kid’s natural joy, exuberance, and loving nature got stomped on, perhaps by stressed-out, dysfunctional, or shut-down parents, bullying kids, or by the educational system itself. We learn to keep our guard up, to be like our peers, and to behave as parents, teachers, and other authority figures expect.

In dating, if we open up to another person, and they don’t match that emotional availability, there is a tendency for us to retreat to a place of isolation, resignation, or hopelessness. We take another person’s non-interest way too personally most of the time.  Truth is, it always has nothing to do with us.  But our vulnerable heart is like a friendly puppy – it just wants to love and be loved – and our ego-mind is like a soldier – it’s job is to preserve and protect us from harm.  Thus, heart and mind become bogged down waging a battle of inner-conflict, with an unconscious strategy operating to prevent future pain.

Staying in our comfort zones usually brings little gain.  To risk vulnerability and risk failing, is also to invite in huge success and greater happiness.  To be blunt, you usually have to take risks to achieve greater fulfillment and success (whatever success means to you).  Keeping our lives risk-free and playing it safe only serves to keep that status-quo predictability going….and for many of us self-growth warriors, the status quo is not where our spirit likes to hang out.  The spirit is always trying to move forward – to greater expansion.  For our true essence is a part of the universe, and as science has shown, we live in an ever-expanding universe.  The way of the Universal Spirit is one of constant change and expansion.  That expansive drive and ever-changing nature lives within our heart.

As you’ve been reading here, my friend and colleague Sue De Santo and I are giving a course called “Dating, Sexuality & Empowerment.” See all the details HERE.  It’s designed to help women break through those heart-protecting patterns and step more fully into their authentic, radiant, self-empowerment. When we break through the mental control that’s trying to preserve our safety with old, self-protecting patterns, our inner light comes pouring through. 

Having inner freedom endows us with an attractive force of love and joy that beams out to the world. We begin to flow with that ever-expanding universe within and without us….life brings to our door exactly what we need to keep circulating that joy and love of our spirit.  We attract the right people (including life partners), opportunities, and conditions to better serve the world and circulate our gifts, talents, and unique contributions.  

To promote this course, Sue and I made a video to put on facebook and youtube.  That’s what practitioners like us do to market our services.  Just part of the job.  But don’t think that it is ever easy for people like us to wear our hearts on our sleeves when we write blogs, when we promote our courses, sessions, and all the offerings we do.  Most of us who do this have had zero training in marketing – though we’ve had lots of training in the services we offer, but still this type of work seems to require continual self-promotion to spread the word.  That self-promotion is risky.  Speaking for myself, my particular shamanic and holistic coaching offerings are not mainstream, to say the least.  The older and wiser I get about the value of my contributions, however, the more I’m willing to be authentic, vulnerable, and open about what I do — in a world that is generally hugely resistant to change, complementary healing techniques, and vulnerability. 

So Sue and I made this video. Please check it out HERE and see the goofy hearts in it. At first we accidentally put a hearts filter on the video, chuckled about it, and then kept it on, with an intent to attract attention and lighten up this topic we’re teaching. To my surprise, it’s been received with kind of a glaringly silent, non-response on facebook.

I’m used to putting up simple photos of trees and getting a bunch of “likes” or “loves”…but I’m getting very little response with this video. The silence is deafening, as they say.  Perhaps some people are offended, don’t get it, or whatever.  But to me, it’s pretty darn goofy and a bit awkward to watch, and I thought I’d at least get a laughing emoji out of someone. However, I’m not taking it personally.  In fact, I’m laughing at myself each time I view it and see my own awkwardness and those goofy hearts. It’s my coyote medicine, for sure. Coyote brings me the gift of finding humor in my own silly antics.

Actually, coyote medicine aside, this course touches a powerful topic with very timely resonance to the awakening of the Divine Feminine now.  I’m absolutely in awe of the fantastic rise of women’s sense of spiritual empowerment now and I’ve always been eager to contribute to that awakening. From women suffragettes to feminists, to the path of the spiritual warriors among us, including the “me too’s”, this is deeply exciting and hopeful phenomenon to observe.

One thing I’ve learned along the way is to carry a certain “lightness of being” as a valued tool on the spiritual path.  If you can find a little loving humor about this mysterious drama of being human, it’s a very healthy thing.  And we know the power of levity at Halloween time, when we dress up to laugh at scary ghosts (the omnipresent reality of death), threatening pirates, ominous witches, and the super-heroes who fight the evils of crime, etc.  Or when we try to dress up like a 1940’s movie star, like I did in 2009.  I loved having fun with a bit of that Hollywood glam, probably because I needed to let that glam shadow side of me out to shine!  

Halloween2009

 

If you can laugh at yourself, and at the self-protective patterns devised by the ego, then you are not identified with that ego.  You are not your mind!  You are not that hurt, scared child who wasn’t seen, wasn’t appreciated, or somehow needed to be “controlled” by stressed out authority figures. To find humor in what is awful, sad, and downright life-invalidating, is to be free of those darker inner forces that keep us feeling frustrated, stuck, and less than miraculous. To be free inwardly is to experience the true bliss that is our essence, no matter how others treat us.  No matter whether they like our videos or not!

I’ll let you in on a little secret:  teachers always teach what they need to learn for themselves…and they usually get their lessons especially when they are preparing for a course. Being a good teacher, healer, coach, or therapist is to be a constant student of life and love. A good teacher is a model for that which they teach. I hope I can do that — I want to inspire you to live ever-expandingly beyond the status quo of your comfort zones in order to be a thriving, joyful human being.  We are not our fears, our resignation, our need to please, or our self-protection.  We are love and Light, eternally.

Looking for love?

photodune-6777212-paradigm-shift--xsAre you wondering why I am presenting a dating, sexuality and empowerment workshop now? The reason isn’t just the “me too” movement…though the timing with that is quite resonant. Having had my own, personal share of inappropriate, offensive, and abusive male harassment, like so many other women, I’ve had to claim my empowerment in a big way after years of suppression, inner conflict, and silence.

I had to wake up first, and realize that I had a voice and a right to boundaries, and that I needed to take a stand on behalf of my inner outrage and that of others who have suffered. In fact, I had to publicly call out a certain teacher I had many years ago, and when I did, about 25 other women came forward with stories of similar inappropriate experiences with him. But the details of that segment of my life is content for a future blog perhaps.

Right now, I want you to know that awakening extends into every corner of our lives, especially in relationships and in self-love. It’s never too late to emerge from the conditioned patterns we were taught by society…or the beliefs about relationships and sexuality, solidified in our childhood and repeating endlessly in later years. It’s those false, limiting beliefs and the subtle, but damaging conditioning that stifles our joy, and keeps us chasing after happiness in the form of external relationships. The truth is, relationships are really an inside job.  Yup, it truly is all about you! Since you can’t change others, the good news is that you can shift your own life, from the inside out.

Through years of dating, sexuality, and relationship turmoil, I learned the hard way that until my sense of worth, inner-knowing, and self-acceptance shifted, I would keep attracting the same type of unfulfilling relationships into my life. All my dating and relationship experiences have revolved around the dance of intimacy and lack there of.  What I took to be the “unavailability” of the other person, was really my own unavailability to myself, due to the cloudy perceptions that entangled my mind. These other people have mirrored to me, my own mental, emotional, and energetic barriers to love.

So as you can tell, this subject matter is close to my heart — and I’m hoping that it will also be calling some of you single women out there too.  I’m collaborating with a very experienced therapist and relationship coach, Sue De Santo, to facilitate both an in-person workshop here in Chicago, and a virtual class series (for out-of-towners and staying cozy-at-home in-towners). This exciting workshop partners energy work with energy psychology to loosen the grip of limiting patterns in order to expand your consciousness around relationships, dating, and sexuality — and change your life.  Do the inner work now and then let 2018 usher in that which your heart desires!

Here are the details and please spread the word if this post finds you happily partnered or married…or if you’re a man (this workshop is for women)….

                 DATING, SEXUALITY & EMPOWERMENT; Sexy is an inside job

         In-person workshop Sunday, Nov. 12, 1:00-3:30pm at Moving Life Studio, 5115 N. Ravenswood, 2nd Floor, Chicago, IL 60640  Fee: $49

AND/OR….

         Virtual, 4-Part Class Series (by teleconference) on Thursdays., Nov. 30, Dec. 7, 14, and 21.   Fee:  $219  *If you miss a class, you’ll have a recording of it.

****TAKE ONE OR BOTH CLASS OPTIONS!  EARLY REGISTRATION FOR ENTIRE PACKAGE (In-person and virtual series) – only $219 (plus a free gift) until Nov. 10, and then $249 after Nov. 10.

These classes are for you if:

  • You are a single woman, any sexual orientation welcome
  • You want the empowerment, freedom, and support to create what you need in a loving, committed relationship.
  • You want to break through old patterns using powerful energy tools and processes, including meditation, guided imagery, and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique).
  • You want to ignite and energetically attract authentic love from within.

Topics for the Virtual 4-Part Class Series are:

  • Week 1 — The magnetic pull of unavailability and how to break through
  • Week 2 — How the kid in you sabotages romance
  • Week 3 — Learning to receive pleasure
  • Week 4 –- Flirting from the inside out

Facilitators:  Paula Rosenfeld, Shamanic practitioner, Holistic Health Coach, and author, www.fromtheheartcenter.com.

Sue De Santo, LCSW, Clinical Social Worker and Relationship Coach. www.suedesanto.com. 

FOR REGISTRATION and MORE INFO, CONTACT PAULA at 773-791-8425  or paula@fromtheheartcenter.com.

 

 

DATING ROLLBACK!

FreeMeditationLogo    What if you could turn back the clock in your dating and relationship life – in order to be free of the years of disappointments, heartbreaks, projections and fears?  Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have had the wisdom in your younger years that you’re acquiring now in your current awakening self?  Maybe you’ve heard the advice about “letting go” and being “open,” but are you able to practice these things? Or is a part of you shut down or disillusioned about dating and the desire for a fulfilling relationship?

I don’t know if it’s possible to recapture our innocence, but I strongly believe we can regain our trust. How powerful to be able to trust yourself, and to know that some kind of power greater than yourself has your back – and is moving you towards your good, if only you’d allow that!

Would you like to be able to offer another person your authentic vulnerability, trust, natural sexiness, and commitment—the authentic you that existed before you started protecting your heart and disregarding the higher wisdom of your spirit?  What a gift it is to stand in your own truth – to feel empowered, self-confident, and deeply attractive in your openness to love! How freeing would it be to let go of needing a relationship to feel whole? Wouldn’t it be a relief to stop stressing about relationships and simply relax into energetically drawing the perfect relationship to you, in the right time and place?

The problem with having traumatic dating and relationship experiences in the past, is that our egos develop compensating behavior to protect us from possible future harm.  Our perceptions become colored by past hurts.  We hang on to the hurts and armor our hearts to feel safe.  We come up with excuses (too busy, too tired, too stressed) to open up to new encounters and unknown experiences.  We fall into ruts of overthinking and subtle avoidance.  We’d rather just deal with the devil we know…for without venturing outside our comfort zone, we may just attract the same old type of relationship with a different face, but a frustrating familiarity.

You can break through this self-sabotage. Dating and sexuality is an inside job;  If you are a single woman and are looking for group support to break through your internal barriers to love – then I have some upcoming classes for you!  (Men and committed women, sorry!  There will be other forthcoming classes for you in the future…)

I will be teaching an experiential in-person workshop, along with a virtual course series, with my collaborator in empowerment, Sue DeSanto, LCSW, a Clinical Social Worker and Relationship Coach. We are going to be using energy tools to actually shift your vibration and bring you back to center…to rollback patterns so you can truly ignite love from within.  You can take the in-person workshop if you’re in the Chicagoland area or just take the virtual course if you’re outside the area.  I especially encourage you to sign up for both, if possible!

What’s included in these classes:

Meditation, guided imagery, holistic coaching, Deeksha, essential oils, and the powerful tool of EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique, also called Tapping).  Together, Sue and I have over 44 years of experience.  Add that to the power of working in a group on shared goals!  Group support exponentially affects positive outcomes.  Nothing moves mountains like feeling supported, and Sue and I will be joyfully bringing our experience and spiritual gifts to support your transformation.

So if you want to start the new year empowered, sexy, and clear from the inside out, then please join us.  There is a big early-registration discount of $30, and a free gift, if you sign up for the entire package – the in-person workshop plus the 4-week virtual series.  Here is a summary of the class events and pricing, along with the registration links:

Dating, Sexuality & Empowerment; Sexy is an inside job

In-person Workshop, Sunday, Nov. 12, 1:00 – 3:30pm at Moving Life Studio, 5115 N. Ravenswood, 2nd floor, Chicago, IL.

4-Part Virtual Course via teleconference:  Thursdays, 7:00-9:00pm, Nov. 30, Dec. 7, 14, 21

Pricing:

In-person workshop alone: $49

Virtual series alone:  $219

Whole Package (In-person plus Virtual Series):  $249 or….

Early-bird Registration by Monday, Nov.10:  $219 for entire package, including the in-person and 4-part  virtual course, plus a free gift!

 

One day workshop registration link:

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/dating-sexuality-empowerment-sexy-is-an-inside-job-tickets-39029102095?aff=utm_source%3Deb_email%26utm_medium%3Demail%26utm_campaign%3Dnew_event_email&utm_term=eventurl_text

 

4-Part Virtual Series registration link and package option with early registration discount:

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/dating-sexuality-empowerment-sexy-is-an-inside-job-in-person-workshop-plus-virtual-4-week-course-tickets-39026311749?aff=utm_source%3Deb_email%26utm_medium%3Demail%26utm_campaign%3Dnew_event_email&utm_term=eventurl_text

 

****NOTE:  IF YOU CAN’T ATTEND ANY OF THE 4 VIRTUAL CLASSES, NO WORRIES – YOU WILL BE GIVEN A RECORDING.

If you have any questions about the offerings or about registration, please contact me at

paula@fromtheheartcenter.com  or  call 773-791-8425

and click HERE for more workshop details and facilitator bios!

 

 

 

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A PRAYER FOR DATING & EARTH DAY

GardenThere’s one prayer that I have highly recommended for years, and used in service of creating my own life’s work, but in one certain area of my life, I haven’t employed it. I’ve been afraid to truly let go enough to pray in this particular arena, in this particular way. That arena is romance, and my fear is that if I truly surrender, I won’t get what I want.  It’s not my preference to be single, and I’ve tried persistently to change the situation as best I can.  As I see it now, even though I’ve prayed for manifestation of a partner in the many various ways that I’ve been taught to pray, it hasn’t worked for a reason. I’ve probably tried to solve the problem from the level of mind that it was created by. As Einstein has pointed out, this just doesn’t work.  In my heart, I know there’s one way of prayer that I haven’t been ready to do.

I’ve certainly had my share of extremely significant and precious relationships; each one lasted until they were finished. Not a unique story for many of us. Yet, I found myself, recently, throwing my hands up in the air, and sighing the proverbial, “I give up”. I was at a new level of despair, frustration and, ultimately, surrender – exactly what was needed, evidently, for my Divine to deliver a big, wake-up message.

Spirit’s breakthrough message came to me via a couple of coffee dates that ironically validated the extraordinary power of intention to manifest what we think we want. But what we manifest may not always be what we really need. The dates left me dazzled by Spirit’s notorious sense of humor, and I eventually saw a big flaw in the prayer technique I’ve been using in my search for a significant other.

For example, I’ve wanted to meet a potential loved one who adores animals just as much as I do. Recently, I was requesting of my Divine that this ideal person have a dog or two, since my landlord doesn’t permit dogs. (I’d imagined enjoying them vicariously, so to speak). I’ve been longing to have a significant relationship with some pets! Sure enough, I met someone with two dogs….and six cats too, bless her heart. Unfortunately, I had forgotten to remind Spirit that I have a low-level cat allergy. My own two beloved cats (now deceased) were fairly manageable for my allergy – but six cats would send me over the edge into asthma.

Dating wake-up call #2: Because I have a few food sensitivities, I can be a bit of a challenge (in some people’s eyes) to dine with. But I am so “over” having to justify certain food avoidances to people. So I’ve been asking my Divine for someone who understands and respects healthy, mindful eating. Who did I attract, you’re wondering? I called in a date with a woman with massive food allergies, (which I have deep, deep compassion for), but her severe allergies include both cats and dogs. Darn, I had forgotten to tell Spirit that my ideal partner, though loving dogs, would not be allergic to them, even allergic to non-allergenic dogs!

Trying to stay on top of all my particular specifications and expectations is exhausting. I can’t think of every single angle, polish my prayers, visualize, and expect my Divine not to have a great laugh at my expense! Here is the big “a-ha” that came a few weeks ago: I’ve got this particular idea of who I think will make me happy, and what I think will make me happy… and I’m expecting Spirit to be like a corporate head hunter who will fill the slot with exactly what I believe I want.

It’s like I have a job opening, and I want my Divine to fill it pronto with someone who has all the right qualifications. Like it’s all about me and my wants … What’s wrong with this picture?

What I see is that I have it all backwards. I need to dwell on what I have to offer, not what I want to get. I suspect things would work much better if I follow my own prayer advice and truly surrender. It’s the “truly” that is really hard.

The prayer goes something like this, and you can direct it to whatever Higher Power is sacred to you personally: “Use me. You know my desires, passions, skills and talents, dear Spirit…Let me please be a channel of your love. In service, Spirit, let me be joyful. Let me add to the world’s good. How, and with whom this might manifest is up to you, dear Spirit, so I let go of the reigns and trust in your wisdom and guidance.”

How this will show up in my dating life, remains to be seen. I’ll keep you posted! I do know that Spirit holds a vision for me, and everyone else, which is truly good and life-supportive. It’s a much higher perspective than my own.

And how does this prayer relate to Earth Day? With eyes wide open in an increasingly transparent world, we all are seeing the masses of politicians and world leaders who, in their humanity, have been severely limited by the consciousness they hold. The world’s a mess due to consciousness that has been conditioned by centuries of fear. The structures that we have taken for granted are crumbling in the wake of rising global awareness and dissension. Ugliness and cruelty also abound rampantly, seemingly hopelessly mired and motivated in fear.

We watch now as our beautiful Earth is being destroyed by this pressure cooker called life in 2017, co-created by all of us. Humans have used, manipulated, and transgressed the natural world to serve our own needs. We have forced our will. All the years of mindless taking from Earth is destroying her. Many of us have seen these times coming for years, but have been unable to influence the consciousness of “those” in control of how money is spent to create this lifestyle we share on Earth. We watch in horror. Some of us march with anger or hope.

As in the state of surrender needed for dating help, perhaps you might join me in humbly praying to Spirit today for help for the world. My Divine has me  writing blog posts, contacting politicians, protesting, setting an example, going back to school to become an integrative nutrition coach, and of course recycling. I am doing these things, but want to do so much more. I want to experience more than give glaring looks at littered sidewalks, shake my head at unhealthy fast food joints, and walk past grocery stores filled with packaged, processed, sugar-laden saboteurs, waiting to destroy someone’s health and happiness. I want to educate, wake-up others, and transform this life-denigrating mess we’ve created.

I hereby pray, and please join me if you feel so moved, to declare: I humbly offer my love, talents, skills, and passion to make this existence better for my own life, the life of our beautiful Earth, all her wondrous creatures, and the generations to come who might never know a glorious late April day like this one (at the rate we’re going), with flowers and trees a’blooming, water coming from faucets, air that is still fairly breathable, and, thank you Spirit, organically, humanely raised food options in the store … because organic farmers get it. Immense thanks to all those who get the value of life, of all things natural, of love, peace, and beauty… and are living in their truth and not in fear.

What is your prayer today? Can you let go and trust Spirit to use your talents, passion, and actions to give to the world what it needs for transformation? If you feel frustrated, confused, fearful, or blocked, please consider taking a step toward faith and action. I urge you to strengthen your bond with the personal Divine of your heart, whatever that looks like for you – so that you can be led to serve, to give, to be a sharer of Light who transforms this chaos and destruction going on now.

If you are feeling that you can’t really “turn it over” to a Divine that you don’t trust, have I got a recommendation for you! There will be another big Oneness event happening on July 1 and 2, in Chicagoland and other parts of the country. It will be a rare chance to strengthen your bond with your personal Divine by leaps and bounds. It will help you connect, expand, brighten your Light, listen within, take action, and create change with your very own awakening consciousness. The event is called The Phenomenon and the Gift. The teachings are live-streamed from Oneness University in India with highly enlightened teachers. Please check out the Chicago event HERE.

If you want to see other locations in the country and world for this incredibly powerful event, look HERE

For the Chicago event, the deadline for the early registration discount is April 30, so don’t delay. There are even payment plans options available for this event!

Wishing you all a day of awe and gratitude for the Earth… and the courage to trust, to let go, and also to take action where you are Divinely guided.